È Ben Detto E Ben Pensato

In what is perhaps still one of the simplest, most moving and - at the same time - most revealing statements regarding the raison d'être for the thrupieceorganisation, the anonymous author of the original professorthrupiece.com website writes: "In symbiotic and synergetic association with all of its constituent companies and partner entities, the thrupieceorganisation pursues its core mission of fulfilling Professor Thrupiece’s vision of unified science and art which is both ethical and approachable whilst remaining trivial and pointless".​ Vast, intricate, labyrinthine and even perhaps byzantine as that organisation may have become, this perfectly distilled rationale for its continuance surely remains both true and essential: a statement for the ages; an aspirational nonpareil; a triumph of concision; a distillation of diamantine clarity; a vade mecum for our febrile priorities in a time of unprecedented change. Which is to say - as the Italians would - "È ben detto e ben pensato".

Such thoughts are prompted by recent suggestions - albeit in the lower echelons of the popular press - that many of the larger multi-national enterprises are losing their heart and soul in a relentless pursuit of profit and monopoly status - presupposing as such statements will - that the relentless pursuit of money and the retention of a well-set moral compass are mutually incompatible or at least poor bedfellows. But was it not Professor Thrupiece himself who once wrote: "Checked my bank statement today to find I had made £2.50 in interest in less than 6 months and all whilst managing to keep my promise to mother not to charge Great Aunt Ringworm more than 260% apr on the fiver I lent her on Boxing Day. Good to know I have helped her and she has only £4-17s-6d left to pay". [Thrupiece Diaries Vol XXIII November 1949 - May 1950]. From small acorns ...

Representation of Professor Thrupiece as an Angel of Business Administration and Ethical Commercial Affairs. It hangs in the foyer of the AJTCorps Building and is an inspiration to staff who pass by it as they proceed through biometric security screening each day. It was designed by Enrique de los Chicos Perdidos and painted by PaintaSaint Ltd, Melbury Bubb.

So it will be abundantly clear that the young Professor Thrupiece not only set the tone for the vast organisation that was to flourish in his name (albeit only after his disappearance) but that he also defined the parameters of its operational code: to help those in need whilst making a tidy sum from their importunate circumstance. As the ancients also recognised "ubi opus est occasio est esse" [where there is need there is an opportunity to be exploited] Marcus Tullius Bonius [10AD] - a statement surely as true today as it was when garum was six scruples to the denarius.

So in a world of unscrupulous business - where "Arabian influences" have penetrated deep into the heart of even our most iconic enterprise, it is surely still to the thrupieceorganisation and its associated companies - whose values are currently best embodied in the shining persona of Mrs Amanda J Threadbone - that we should look for guidance, reassurance and ultimately salvation.

This article originally appeared in The Great Heaving Business, Cultural and Commercial Park Staff Newsletter [May 2019] to the Honorary Supervising Editor of which - Mrs Amanda J Threadbone - we remain deeply indebted.