thrupiece.com sub-editor Ian Rankin-Comptence seems set to pay a heavy price for his egregious error in posting an incorrect picture of ex-professional footballer and self-confessed coitally-challenged Niagra advocate Orften Floppé. Rather than featuring the distinctive visage of the Todber United striker "who couldn't score on the pitch or in the back passage of Todgers Nite Club", Friday's edition of the internationally famous blog mistakenly posted instead a photograph of the "missing presumed disappeared" Professor Brian Thrupiece - a face as well-known to the public as that of Mr Floppé himself. It is understood that the matter is the subject of "deeply penetrative" investigations within the Threadbone Corporation, the executive officers of which are determined to "get to the bottom of the whole sorry incident".
Summoned by Threadbone Corporation CEO Mrs Amanda J Threadbone, Mr Rankin-Comptence was left in no doubt as to the seriousness of his offence, the precariousness of his position or the steps he was expected to take in order to accept complete culpability for the debacle and thereafter “do the right thing”.
“Having been summoned by Threadbone Corporation CEO Mrs Amanda J Threadbone yesterday, I was left in no doubt as to the seriousness of my offence, the precariousness of my position or the steps I am expected to take to accept complete culpability for the debacle and thereafter do the right thing", Mr Rankin-Comptence told friends and family yesterday evening.
He went on: "Accordingly I have today accepted complete culpability for the debacle and have, therefore, dismissed my deputies To-Ken Skape-Gowt and Kompani Fall-Guy who have left their posts with immediate effect. I trust this - for me - highly satisfactory conclusion will bring the matter to an end".
In the meantime, facial recognition experts at Threadbone Digital Laboratories are believed to have offered some comfort to Mr Rankin-Comptence. "Recognising faces and putting names to them is not always easy, especially when they are famous", says FRT director Pho Tofitt, "when faced with two different but familiar faces in - say - an archive file, it is easy to become confused and mistake one for the other. Only the other day, I made the schoolboy error of inadvertently swapping the identities of Pinky and Perky even though I have known them since childhood. Without Harry Corbett to point one in the right direction, even the best of us can get it wrong".
The Source of the Confusion: [TOP] ex-footballer and HORNIMINT Niagra advocate Orften Floppé; [BOTTOM] Culinary Bio-ethicist and former Todber United AFC Ethics and Dietary Advisor Professor Brian Thrupiece. Confusing the two is easy to understand, says facial recognition experts at the Threadbone Laboratories: "Photo-editors do it all the time which is more than can be said for Mr Floppé".
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