Alma Mater
THE CAMBRIDGE HOME OF PROFESSOR BRIAN THRUPIECE
ABOUT US
Scimus, ubi habitas
Professor Thrupieces's alma mater which several times failed to recognise his achievement during his lifetime but was not slow to acknowledge his post mortem wealth
"We don't take Yes for an answer"
College Specialisms
Fundraising
Financial Exsanguination
Donation Sourcing
Vanity Project Management
Campaign Enforcement
Alumni Tracking & Detection
not endorsed by
a highly fundable cambridge institution
PROFESSOR THRUPIECE's Cambridge college at which he arrived as an 18-year-old in 1958 and from which he graduated in 1961 was a place dear to his heart during his lifetime. He would want all alumni to give the College their money.
It was here that he met Dr Kenwood Cheffe [a Fellow of St Archibalds] whose pioneering work on inert nutrition led the young Professor to make some of his greatest and most commercially-valuable discoveries. He would want you to support work such as his.
"Master and former Chief Druid Hawthorn Stragglybeard is keen to acknowledge the Professor's importance and anxious to "return him - or at least his capital - to the fold". "He, or should I say it rightfully belongs here".
The College, which did not always value the Professor during his lifetime and on several occasions failed to elect him into Honorary Fellowship, has come to value his work and the profits from it very highly indeed. It knows that, were he alive today (sic) he would want you to give generously to support the foundation which nurtured him.
the college is currently committed to raising money for a much needed multi-storey, multi-faith information resource, disco aquarium and casino cinema complex.
to find out how you can make our fantasy a reality contact the fellow for rape and pillage Mr Bloodfromastone Strongarm at: bloodfromastone_Strongarm@mcc.cam.ac.uk
"IT IS GIVEN TO SOME TO GIVE AND SOME TO RECEIVE, WE LIKE TO THINK OF OURSELVES AS THE LATTER"
Hawthorn Stragglybeard" Master
feeding frenzy: the Campaign for money
THE COLLEGE has been fundraising since the 15th century and continues to do so today in ever more sophisticated ways. Using new state-of-the-art Financial Hoovering Technology™ the College is now capable of seeking out alumni wherever they live and extracting capital through a variety of psychological, physical and electronic means.
So why not give now and avoid all the hassle?
Cick on any of the links below to give all you can and more.
DOWNLOAD THE FULLY EXPLANATORY CAMPAIN BROCHURE BY CLICKING ON THE IMAGE
