Giant online retailer Orinoco, currently under investigation by the Mergers and Monopolies Commission of the West Dorset Supreme Council's Office for the Pointless Investigation of Standards in Trading [OFPISTE], has launched an all new website hosted - controversially - by the thrupiece organisation. Seamless integration into the thrupiece organisation's Threadbone-driven merchandising arm makes customers, according to some industry analysts, virtual captives of the multi-national giant.
However, in a move designed to thrill the technologically minded, orinoco has launched the orinoco gecko and orinoco spot as part of its drive to win market share in the music streaming and smart home sectors. The sleekly designed machines offer an unrivalled in-house experience as those with suitably equipped homes and mobile devices can control the lives of others at the touch of a button. Threadbone laboratory scientists who have developed the gecko and its smaller companion the spot have incorporated the later Boneco 8-core chipset to give a smarter and faster response to voice commands, dog whistles and other household noises.
The orinoco gecko and spot are designed to deliver orinoco's unlimited music service to those with an annual contract