Threadbone Memorial Opens Old Wounds
Dozens of Threadbone Corporation employees - including some volunteers - attended a memorial service at the Fishpond Bottom Neo-Adventist Technical Church of Christ Our Driver to mark the 10th Anniversary of the passing of the husband of Mrs Amanda J Threadbone.
Mr Threadbone died in an incident involving a mini-tractor and a boy scout in January 2007 though many believe that the unfortunate incident was itself the result of declining health occasioned by the late Mr Threadbone's arduous trip up the Orinoco in search of a well-known internet bookseller. The trip, organised by Mrs Threadbone resulted in the founding of the Orinoco Media Company (no relation to the wholly-owned Thrupiece Organisation subsidiary Orinoco Trading Inc.) but was otherwise unsuccessful.
Mr Threadbone's "cremation" - his body was immolated in a petrol-fuelled mini-tractor incendiary ceremony sanctioned only by the Fishpond Bottom Neo-Adventist Technical Church of Christ Our Driver - was widely held to be controversial at the time, though sources close to Mrs Threadbone yet again insisted yesterday that everything had been conducted according to his exact wishes and was entirely above board.
No such controversy attended yesterday's rituals. After a short address by Mr Threadbone's recently retraced amanuensis - former Spanish Boy Scout Enrique - the congregation sang Lianna Rose's haunting "I want My Tractor Back" and retired for tea and fairy cakes at the local DHRA Assembly Hall, Fishpond Bottom
Mr Threadbone's controversial end as he and his mini-tractor go up in flames © The Threadbone Corporation Staff Newsletter, January 2007