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Doing TIME

At long last TIME Magazine has bowed to international pressure and not only commissioned a thoughtful piece about the late Professor Thrupiece, but also featured him on its iconic cover - albeit through an unauthorised and - to some - wholly discredited portrait. No matter we say: justice at last has been if not done, then "close to done".

Long famed for its in-depth analysis and timely presentation of "important people of our time", TIME Magazine had for far too long ignored the pressing case of the long silent but now more influential than ever Professor Brian Pemberton Charleywood Thrupiece; pioneer thinker, protean inventor and founder of the greatest school of Culinary Bio-ethics the world has yet known.

For more than a decade friends and supporters - including Mrs Amanda J Threadbone (backed by the muscle of The Threadbone Corporation) and Ms Audrey Badminton-Court (long time collaborator and now widely acknowledged joint-author of the Thrupiece Tables) - have been urging the prestige international publisher to "do the right thing" and expose the Professor to a still wider public. It is widely believed that the topic was high on the list of discussion points at the recent Trump/May summit at which Drexit, the US status of the RSCBE and the expiring thrupiecediet US patent were also matters of expressed concern. Whether through such pressure or the "overwhelming rightness of the case" a version of the Professor adorns the cover of the latest issue.

Even some of the Professor's strongest advocates had almost given up hope and Ms Badminton-Court admitted today that she began to doubt she would ever see the day when the Campaign would be successful: "I began to doubt that I would ever see the day when the Campaign would be successful", a frail Ms Badminton-Court confirmed through life-long friend Celia Notso-Pointy, "though where there's LIFE there's hope". Told that it was TIME rather than LIFE Magazine which had printed the story, a dismayed Ms Badminton Court muttered under her breath . and then more audibly added "Well its back the bloody drawing board then. Schist."

Still, whatever the source and whatever the motive, most of the Professor's admirers are delighted that TIME has at last "done its duty", "righted this egregious wrong" and "pulled its finger out". Speaking for the RSCBE, President Professor Sir Harvey Bristolcream told assembled reporters it was time to go home.

"That" Cover: It may not be the Professor but justice has been done

"That" Cover: It may not be the Professor but according to Thrupiece activists, "justice has been done". [Photo courtesy LIFE Magazine]

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