Concern over the wellbeing of leading Dorset entrepreneur and executive Mrs Amanda J Threadbone eased last night following unconfirmed rumours that she was on holiday in Greece with her new PA and Personal Fitness Trainer Manuel da Curación-Palmas.
Speculation regarding the health of the "vintage" (surely "veteran" (ed)) CEO, CFO and Board Chair of Threadbone Corporation / thrupiece organisation and President for LIFE of the DHRA intensified following an unprecedented three day radio silence from the normally communicative celebrity Dorset Businesswoman of the Year (2005-14, 2016)*.
Mrs Threadbone, whose age has only been estimated but never confirmed said, through her Greek PR Representative: Κωνσταντίνος Νήμα Oστών (Konstantínos Níma Ostón)
"Είμαι καλά όπως και ο Μανουήλ, κάνουμε πραγματικά ενδιαφέροντα πράγματα εδώ και μαθαίνω ένα φανταστικό ποσό για μια γυναίκα της εποχής μου." Ποιος ήξερε ότι θα μπορούσα να είμαι τόσο ευέλικτος; "Μπορεί να έχω το σώμα μιας ισχυρής και επιτυχημένης Γυναίκα, αλλά έχω το πνεύμα ενός Ολυμπίου και την σίγουρη ανηφόρα μιας κατσίκα στο βουνό - εκτός από το πρώτο πράγμα το πρωί, όταν παίρνει λίγο χρόνο για τον Μανουήλ να με πάει"
Or for those unfamiliar with the Greek alphabet: "Eímai kalá ópos kai o Manouíl, kánoume pragmatiká endiaféronta prágmata edó kai mathaíno éna fantastikó posó gia mia gynaíka tis epochís mou." Poios íxere óti tha boroúsa na eímai tóso evéliktos? "Boreí na écho to sóma mias ischyrís kai epitychiménis Gynaíka, allá écho to pnévma enós Olympíou kai tin sígouri anifóra mias katsíka sto vounó - ektós apó to próto prágma to proí, ótan paírnei lígo chróno gia ton Manouíl na me páei ".
For those with no Greek at all, Mrs Threadbone has reluctantly consented to the publication of an English translation. If you really need it click HERE.
Other sources close to the apparently buoyant and smiling Mrs Threadbone were willing to say off the record that she was unusually upbeat, greeting them every morning with a "smile close to a smirk" thanks they believe to a hand from Manuel. Manuel trained at the Gigolo School of Advancement in Arenal, Mallorca.
*The 2015 award went by mistake to Geeta Roadthrew, Managing Director of Dorset Cascara Industries ["The Products That Really Move You"]. It was later withdrawn after a legal challenge by the Threadbone Corporation and - as a result of an out-of-court settlement - the re-award to the rightful winner Mrs Amanda J Threadbone was not publicly announced.
Mykonos: where it is all happening. ANTI-CLOCKWISE FROM TOP: The exclusive Hotel Magna Mykonos Beach Hotel where the party are believed to be staying; several members of Mrs Threadbone's group take a relaxing walk with the Threadbone Corporation's Greek PR Representative Konstantínos Níma Ostón and his "secretary" far right; Mrs Threadbone (or more probably her stylist, Belinda Ward-Robe) in the Hotel Mykonos Beach lobby before dinner. The clutch bag is by Stella Coco Thrupiece (Paris, Milan, New York, Great Heaving).
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