A Joint Statement From The Thrupiece Organisation And The Threadbone Corporation

A Statement from CEO, CIO and President Mrs Amanda J Threadbone:

"Now that both national and Dorset-wide regulation and red tape requires hard-pressed corporates and other organisations to give employees unconscionable amounts of time away from their desks at Christmas, it is impossible to staff the work stations of our divisions, subsidiaries and partner companies in the way that I would like. I apologise for the fact that trivial social considerations, accumulated cultural habits and pusillanimous government (of the bureaucracy, by the bureaucracy and for the bureaucracy) have conspired to reinforce and legitimise the spineless tendencies of the feckless and naturally work-shy and that it is simply impossible to maintain "business as usual" during the so-called Festive Period.

It follows that all the offices, branches and outlets of the entire thrupiece organisation, Threadbone Corporation, RSCBE, Horinimint, Threadbone Extra companies will be closed between midnight on 24 December and 12.01 am 26 on December 2017. I would like to apologies to all those inconvenienced by this needless act of commercial vandalism whilst stressing that none of it is my fault.

Still more distressingly, this unwarranted interference in the personal liberties of employers and their ability to dictate meaningful and commercially viable terms to those lucky enough to be in their employ (for now!) means that no creative staff are available to service me in my efforts to construct and disseminate my usual Christmas message. The card below will have to do.

PS . This is precisely what we in the ongoing Campaign for a Very Hard Drexit are fighting for!"

The traditional Threadbone Corporation Christmas Greeting has been hit by troubles this year as CEO, CIO and President Mrs Amanda J Threadbone has been forced to admit.