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New Light On An Old Story

As reactions to the world premiere of Professor Brian Thrupiece's Culinary Bio-ethical Salome (Froutosalátadrome Theatre Beaminster, Tues-Sat 8pm matinee Thurs, Sat 2.30pm) continue to pour in, the scholarly community is displaying signs of rare excitement as academics debate the legitimacy, veracity and even stage-worthiness of the rediscovered masterpiece.

Culinary Bio-ethical Salome: the opening scene of the Beaminster production features Beverley Sisters lookalikes Julie, Bobbie and Trudie Lookalike: audience favourites from the TV show

Who Gives a Flying F..k about the 50s?

Writing in today's Musical Dorset Magazine, musicologist Delius Smith has drawn strong parallels between Professor Thrupiece's use of mute Beverley Sisters lookalikes - the menacing suitcase-carrying Betterware salesmen of the opening tableaux vivant - and the 2 second pause in Act II Scene I of "A Village Romeo and Juliet": a connection all the more intriguing given that Professor Thrupiece is not known to have visited Bradford nor ever been seen in a hand-sewn three piece woollen double breasted. "I think moreover that Joy, Babs and Teddie would have approved" Ms Smith writes, "they knew the biblical story well and were, I believe, overheard on several occasion discussing the merits and consequences of giving someone a head - or something very like that."

Overcompton Arts and Books Magazine has an exclusive insight in to Professor Thrupiece's theatrical masterpiece Culinary Bio-ethical Salome by veteran dramaturgist Sir Gay Eisenbeerstein

East Creech's veteran dramaturgist Sir Gay Eisenbeerstein has, meanwhile, defended the play and in particular the controversial volte face in which Salome, having wrestled with her Culinary Bio-ethical conscience, finally accepts Herod's generous fruitarian alternative. Writing in yesterday's Over Compton Arts and Books Magazine he argues the "absolute sense" of her choice. "Like the biblical Salome, the Man from Del Monte was famous for saying NO. However, it is well documented that, when faced with an excellent proposal, "he say YES". What then could be more appropriate than, having being offered and having resisted almost anything that her heart could desire, Professor Thrupiece's Salome, cannot say NO to the perfect pineapple chunks to which the equally adamant Man from Del Monte has himself presumably already said YES!". It makes perfect dramatic sense and might even be described as Professor Thrupiece's supreme moment of absolute dramatic realism".

Del Monte Pineapple Chunks are currently 2 for the price of 3 at all larger branches of Threadbone Extra. No hurry; stocks will last.

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