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An Abject Apology

THAT CLARIFICATION: two great men who once did two great jobs. [i.e. one each.] would like to apologise most sincerely for the egregious error committed in yesterday's communication wherein we posted an incorrect picture of distinguished RDC Chief Constable Sir Rising Crimewave. A "schoolboy error" committed by office work-experience schoolboy Ronald Skewell-Buoy, the picture which appeared was, in fact, that of much-loved actor Raymond Francis star of the 1950s television crime series No Hiding Place. In mitigation, we can only plead that the inscription on the portrait of Mr Francis was misleading. [Ongoing inquiries will establish whether the inscription was [a] genuine, [b] the result of a prank, [c] the result of an abduction by aliens from outer space etc etc...]

Whatever the cause, we unreservedly apologise for any distress caused to Sir Rising, Lady Crimewave and their family and post a corrected picture of the Dorset Chief Constable in the hope of making amends and avoiding - in our view unnecessary - official police retribution.

We understand that Lady Crimewave has recently been "under the knife" and all at wish her a speedy recovery from her bunion excavation proceedings.

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