It is a well-known fact that in his younger days and before he fully embraced the concept of global reflux, Professor Thrupiece liked an occasional drink. Indeed he was a familiar and [generally] welcome sight in any number of hostelries throughout Dorset, many of which are now keen to stake a claim in the multi-million-pound Thrupiece "business". Ever eager to expand their customer base, landlords up and down the county are vying with each other to attract their share of the ever-growing Thrupiece tourist market. Literally dozens of Thrupiece enthusiasts now arrive in Dorset, especially during the summer months, determined to visit each and every location with any claim to a special place on the Thrupiece map. Some have invented Thrupiece-based menus, others offer speciality Thrupiece-badged craft beers. All share one common aim: to exploit the vulnerable and rob them of their hard-earned cash.
In this occasional series, we seek to investigate all such claims and to promote only those establishments with a genuine Thrupiece connection. By recording all such places and properly evaluating their "claims" we, in partnership with both the RDC's Fair Thrupiece Trading Office and our colleagues at CAMRATH [The Campaign for Authentic Thrupiece Hostelries] seek to construct a wholly reliable Good Professor Thrupiece Pub Guide - a vade mecum in which the public at large can confidently place their trust.
NUMBER 1: THE BUNCH OF CARROTS, WORGRET:
Originally a 15th-century swilling house and later an 18th-century coaching inn, The Bunch of Carrots on The Street, Wogreth is typical of the local pub scene. It was first visited by Professor Thrupiece in 1957 when he was just 17. Oral tradition suggests that he tried to order a Babycham but was advised by jocular locals keen to rib the young man to "try a pint of the local piss" instead. He did, little suspecting that they were not in fact joking. The Professor was a less than keen beer drinker thereafter and would, friends say, turn green at the thought of a pale ale or continental lager. [Lest the idea take root that the Professor was being victimised, local historian Mun Dane [see Mun Dane [2011] Nothing Ever Happens Here: Worget Through The Ages" [Threadbone Local Histories] reassures us that this was a local tradition amounting to an initiation rite or rite of passage to which all first-time drinkers were subject.]
Over the next 30 years the Professor would occasionally fetch up in the snug, sometimes accompanied by a female friend or drinking companion. A plaque to that effect hangs under the dartboard. The local "pint of piss" has recently been renamed in his honour. Tegestologist please note that beer mats carrying this logo are highly collectable and disappear quickly.
The Bunch of Carrots is open during normal pub hours [10.30am - 11pm] weekdays [10.30am - 1am Saturdays, 12 noon - 3 pm, 8pm - 11pm Sundays] with an extension on the first Friday of each month when the popular Folk Night attracts local singers of variable talent. Occasional Steak, Curry and Quiz Nights occur throughout the year [contact hosts Mavis and Colum Cask-Hales for details] and are popular with those with nothing better to do. [see Mun Dane [2011] Nothing Ever Happens Here: Worget Through The Ages" [Threadbone Local Histories].
NEXT TIME:
NUMBER TWO: THE QUIET WOMAN, EAST CREECH
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