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You've Not Got Mail

professorthrupiece.com is pleased and privileged to offer this exclusive opportunity to view Mrs Threadbone's Official 2022 Christmas Card. Always a much anticipated event and "the unofficial starting gun for the whole Christmas festive season" [Dorset Countdown to Christmas Magazine], this year's unveiling is particularly thrilling.


Featuring a formal portrait by longtime companion, former Mr Threadbone amanuensis and ex-Spanish Boy Scout Enrique de los Chicos Perdidos, the card is printed on 250gm satin luxury paper using the latest Threadbone Colourintenso|digiprint™ technologies.


Ordinary morals should not, however, hold their breath. Only 1,000 cards have been printed and these will be hand delivered to Mrs Threadbone's most influential friends. The rest of us can only observe in deep envoy or - if you are an upwardly mobile wannabe - download a copy, print it at home*, place in a prominent position and watch the jaws of friends and family drop as they scan the mantlepiece in shocked disbelief!


* for best results we recommend using Threadbone printyourown|digiprint™ technologies available at all branches of Edna's ["The corner shop near you"]. Other print-it-yourself facilities are available [Ed].


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The Threadbone Corporation (AJTCorps)

The Mall

Great Heaving

West Lulworth, UK

Tel: +44 (0)1929 400000

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DISCLAIMER: Though it will be perfectly obvious that the absurd world of Professor Thrupiece and his corporate affairs is no more nor less than the product of a fevered brain, it is clearly affirmed here that any resemblance to actual persons, organisations or events is purely coincidental and that no slight or injury of any kind is intended to any person alive, dead or yet to be born.

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