Could Mass Hysteria Explain Spate of Thrupiece Manifestations
A crack team of psychiatrists drawn from institutions across Dorset has been parachuted into the Nunnery of Our Lady of Strange Apparitions (East Pulham) after a spate of Thrupiece-related images appeared in food products served in the convent's refectory. Ecclesiastical authorities were alerted to the "epidemic of apparitions" by Mother Superior Magnum Caseum. They follow hot on the heels of reports of a manifestation in a flake-topped Mr Whopper earlier in the week.
Three of the food products on which Thrupiece-related images have appeared. Ecclesiastical authorities are puzzled - neither chocolate chip cookies nor apples are normally served after Septuagesima Sunday.
"Though this may simply be an improbable coincidence, clusters of this nature usually suggest a connective narrative - a psychic trigger of some kind which leads to diverse but correlated outcomes from a single common cause" says lead psychiatrist Dr Sanity Czech. "We suspect at this stage that the temporary fame projected onto Sister Concepta Incredibili may have led to feelings of jealousy and envy amongst the other sisters - feelings amplified by the sense of isolation and self-abnegation normally encouraged in the cloistered world of the nunnery. The prospect of similar momentary fame may have bred a kind of mass hysteria amongst the others - hence their projection of a potent image onto the everyday objects to which they had access. This is not to say that the manifestations are not genuine only that they are psychotic projections and so definitely not genuine", she explained.
Meanwhile the Roman Catholic Bishop of Tarrant Launceston has asked for a full search to be made of the East Pulham premises, though a spokesperson admitted nothing of interest had yet been found - "just a few old kitchen implements and an oddly shaped bread stamp".
Just one of the objects discovered in the search: an "oddly-shaped bread stamp" said by ecclesiastical authorities to be of no material interest.