Fans of tedious black and white archive-based documentaries who enjoy watching other (now largely dead) people having fun will be thrilled by Wednesday night's Thrupiece TV offering which, according to an unidentified source close to the producers is "pure filmic gold", containing "material of inestimable archival value". Says who? we ask.
Certainly TV critic of the Belchalwell Sunday Times is impressed, choosing the 4.5 minute documentary as his "Pick of the Week". For those who would rather not watch the programme (attention spans are not what they were these days and 4.5 minutes is a long time - enough at least to boil an egg (or your head if you like this sort of thing [ed]), suffice it to say that it is an opportunistic compilation of recently rediscovered (why??) archive footage held in the vaults of the Thrupiece Archive in Great Heaving and (quite happily) unseen for more than half a century. It was "found" by researchers in their quest to satisfy a FOI inquiry by a bunch of good-for-nothing nosey parkers prying in to the affairs of Royston "Roy" Binstock the recently appointed Deputy Chair of the Threadbone Corporation.
The TV critic of the Belchalwell Sunday Times is impressed, choosing the 4.5 minute documentary as his "Pick of the Week". Critics of this kind of "cheap and meretricious mid Summer programming" are less impressed. "Many of of viewers love this sort of material", says Thrupiece TV Commissioning Editor, Flo Kussgloop "others not so much". "For some of our older viewers 4.5 minutes is ideal for nipping out, putting on the kettle and doing the needful", she added.
If the new documentary proves nothing else it proves that we should all be careful what we wish for. Digging around in other people's sordid pasts is never without consequence and we have a couple of useless w*****s to thank for tonight's unforeseen and wholly unwelcome outfall. Viewers hoping to see the latest episode of Commissaire Berglàre will just have to wait a week. Typical!
Our usual TV editor is on holiday [ed]
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