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Hoovering Up The Record


Doubts were raised - momentarily - today about the authenticity of Professor Thrupiece's historic 1958 US Roadtrip when eagle-eyed reader Angela Eegel-Ayd spotted a number of inconsistencies in the accompanying images which she assumed indicated either covert analogue/digital reconstructive interventionism in the image-manipulation arena (aka "doctoring") or a case of "comic license" - either of which she implied constituted a distortion of the true historical record.


Side by Side comparison of the two images by photogrammetric experts have proved allegations of "covert analogue/digital reconstructive interventionism in the image-manipulation arena" to be groundless, a Threadbone source said this morning.

Side by Side comparison of the two images by photogrammetric experts have proved allegations of "covert analogue/digital reconstructive interventionism in the image-manipulation arena" to be groundless, a Threadbone source said this morning.

Happily tests on the the "originals" which she submitted to the Threadbone Photo-Digital Laboratory for Advanced Image Manipulation for independent scrutiny proved that they were of more doubtful provenance than the Thrupiece Archive-sourced images used in the recent Threadbone Comics Commemorative Issue. Further proof of the veracity of the Threadbone Comic account - should it be required - comes from the Diaries of the late President Dwight D. Eisenhower in which we read:

August 10 1958

Called in for a burger and large fries at Chez Bubba Cafe, 1234 May St Goehner, Waco, NE 68364 and was just chomping on an Idaho gherkin when a guy asked if he could take the spare seat. Apparently just 18, he seemed mature for his age and - after a bit a set-to over an onion ring (it could have belonged to either of us but I am pretty sure it was mine and jeez doesn't the President have some kind of jurisdiction in these things) - we talked about the need for a National Space Agency. He seemed a clued-up kin of a fella but claimed he's done some advanced methane rocket work for the Russkies. Could be a cookie but could be the guy we need. I'll ask J Edgar to drop the oral stuff* and check him out.

*J Edgar Hoover (January 1, 1895 – May 2, 1972) first Director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation of the United States was always keen to find ways of extending the remit of the service. At the time of The President's meeting with Professor Thrupiece, J Edgar was worried about moral standards amongst the US citizenry and issued his famous remark "I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce." [Ed]


Professor Thrupiece with J Edgar Hoover in 1961. The two had met on a what the American's termed a Julie Andrews Basis ("getting-to-know-you; getting-to-know-all-about-you ...") and despite having nothing in common has become cautious collaborators. Professor Thrupiece's "clear and evident heterosexuality" [FBI Case File: Thrupiece 1961 A598786768/bii] was a barrier to closer intimacies.

Meanwhile, Ms Eegel-Ayd has been taken (voluntarily) to a place of safety accompanied only by an observer and a Roget's Thesaurus, the latter specially modified to administer a small electric shock every time she reaches for a more complex synonym.


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