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Heavens to Betsy

Betsy - the world wide interweb portal that allows creative talent to both flourish and market itself has a new kid on the block. Not that Mrs Endersley-Kindersley is exactly a kid, of course, [or exactly ”new” [Ed]] though the sprightly octogenerian might easily be mistaken for one given the spring in her step friends report as a result of the new all-digital enterprise she has launched this month.



Just one of the many beautiful images available from the MyRedeemerPrints website

Having purchased late last year, for an undisclosed sum, the rights to a limited number of Professor Thrupiece images [two to be exact] Mrs Endersley-Kindersley has clearly decided to "max out" her investment by providing a customised service which allows anyone with access to a computer - and quite a bit of spare cash [as well as no discernment [Ed]] to upload an image of a loved one to the Betsy-hosted website which the clever people at MyRedeemerPrints then artfully paste into a pre-chosen landscape containing one of the two pictures of the Professor thus creating a touching artwork of indescribable spiritual value.



The idea first came to Mrs Endersley-Kindersley as a result of many conversations with DHRA friends and acquaintances which she says "frequently revolved around the Professor and his still unexplained disappearance"* and which "just as frequently" ended with the phrase "I so wish I had met him". Now says Mrs Endersley-Kindersley, "they can plausibly claim to have done so thanks to a little digital trickery" [surely "thanks to a little digital magic" [Ed]]. Though the site is bound to attract interest from those with baser motives who merely wish to boost their own self-esteem "by association", it is, says chief digital technician Manny Pewlater "really intended for those looking for spiritual redemption, moral uplift and the opportunity to give to a loved one the gift of faux benediction and quasi-authentic vicarious beatitude".


* CONTEXTUAL NOTE: According to varying reports Professor Thrupiece either disappeared from a Swiss hotel room whilst attending the annual Edna Awards or, "died" unexpectedly following a friendly encounter with a young lady friend and a less friendly encounter with a small electrical appliance. Anyone still interested is referred for further details to the capacious files held by Les autorités suisses, video news briefings held by the RDC, numerous copies of the Sydling St Nicholas Sun and a number of books/articles published by the Threadbone Press.



Opportunism: Unidentified man [left] is just one many of seeking to boost both image and self esteem by pictorial association with Professor Thrupiece [right]. Employers have reported a 400% increase i the number of applicants appending a Thrupiece-themed photograph to their CVs.

Judging from the many endorsements posted on the site, satisfied customers seem more than happy with the results either way. One such - Mrs E Silly-Pleezd - uploaded a picture of her grand daughter and within days had "the most marvellously rendered facsimile of a near biblical encounter" all ready to place on her bedside cabinet in place of her signed photograph of the late Jess Yates. "The picture just emanates grace, wisdom and - I believe - has a very special aura of salvation about it". "It's as though the Professor is walking amongst us once again and inviting little children to come unto him - in a nice way of course, nothing nasty or uncalled for".


THAT WEBSITE: A SNAPSHOT



 
 
 

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The Threadbone Corporation (AJTCorps)

The Mall

Great Heaving

West Lulworth, UK

Tel: +44 (0)1929 400000

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DISCLAIMER: Though it will be perfectly obvious that the absurd world of Professor Thrupiece and his corporate affairs is no more nor less than the product of a fevered brain, it is clearly affirmed here that any resemblance to actual persons, organisations or events is purely coincidental and that no slight or injury of any kind is intended to any person alive, dead or yet to be born.

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