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Writer's pictureProfessor Brian Thrupiece

orinoco Take Two

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Following its earlier announcement of the launch and limited availability for purchase of "Faux Outdoor Worlds by orinoco", the orinoco store has now added two further miniaturised scenarios to its catalogue. Available separately with the usual range of add-on accessories, The Tropical Island Experience by orinoco is joined by The British Seaside Experience by orinoco and - for those missing their daily nightmare journey into and out of our larger Dorset conurbations - The Monday to Friday Commuter Experience by orinoco.


Lovingly sculpted from diverse plasticine and plasticine-substitute materials together with 100% organic plantlife (the health of indoor plants may go down as well as up and a strict regime of maintenance is required) these two welcome additions to the range will go a long way towards countering criticism that the initial release was "a little exotic and perhaps a little outrée for the tastes of the ordinary unwillingly incarcerated Dorset citizen who might experience some difficulty in easily identifying with the castaway experience embedded in the first release".


The British Seaside Experience by orinoco: a more familiar and perhaps more readily identifiable experience.

Certainly, the more recent models bring things closer to home - perhaps too close for some. Viewing the ultra-realistic The Monday to Friday Commuter Experience by orinoco, one guinea-pig tester - Mr Leyte-Again of Alton St Pancras - said a mere glance at the model was enough to give him the heebie-jeebies. "It brought it all flooding back again - the stress, the smell, the overcrowding, the fight to find a seat, the anxiety of whether we'd get to Fiddleford Junction on time - it was like being there. In fact, it was so awful I was grateful when they took it away and I realised that there are in fact worse things than being stuck at home with my wife".


The Monday to Friday Commuter Experience by orinoco: for some its startlingly realistic reproduction of their daily agony is too much to bear.

A spokesperson for orinoco said that "different customers have different reactions to the startling realism and the flashbacks that the models can induce. For some its welcome escapism, for others its something that makes simply them grateful to be locked up, aimless and bored".

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