As the whole of Dorset prepares for Freedom Day [or the Big Opening Bang as the Sydling St Nicholas Sun [as well as Stringbonefellows' Club Members [Ed] would have it] on July 19th, some members of the general population appear to be confused and would like to know what exactly will and will not be permitted after all CONTRIK-69 legal restrictions are lifted.
So just how different will life be as we come to terms with a completely, fully and comprehensively restored one-way, no reversals, unbridled return to pre-CONTRIK-69 normality?
We asked our Public Health and Public Policy expert Nofor King-Diffrins to outlines the changes.
THOSE POST JULY 19 CHANGES IN FULL:
1. Social Distancing: Was 2 metres everywhere, now 2 metres in all places
2. Face masks [aka PPE]: Previously to be worn everywhere outside the home, now to be worn only in all designated places, ie outdoors, in shops, restaurants, pubs, public transport, places of entertainment, places of work, public spaces and all other indoor and outdoor places other than an individual's own domicile
3. Gatherings: Were restricted to a certain number of individuals [bubble-related] depending on venue and type of event. Now ONLY restricted to a certain number of individuals [bubble-related] depending on venue and type of event.
4. Trick and Trap: Was fully operational [ie didn't work]. Now de-sensitised to trigger a positive response only when an individual spends 2 seconds or more within 1.5 miles of a positive case [ie still doesn't work]. Those "pinged" should self-isolate for 8 weeks and communicate with others via a DHS-approved sanitised mobile device.
5. Testing: Was every adult twice a week, now all adults two times weekly
6 Self-Isolation: Was compulsory in the face of a positive test or for any other reason specified by DHS, now only compulsory in the face of a positive test or for any other "operational" reason specified by RDC
6. Lockdown: Was mandatory in certain situations [ie pending a test result or following a positive test] with practical enforcement via RDC COVID-69-Special Ops Flying Squads, now mandatory in certain sitations [pending a test result or following a non-negative test] with practical enforcement via RDC post-COVID-69 Special Ops Flying Squads
7. Personal Hygeine and Protection: Was face and hand washing recommended [40 seconds exposure in 60°C soap and water or anti-bacterial gel] every 2 hours, now Face and Hand Washing recommended [40 seconds exposure in 140°F soap and water or anti-bacterial gel] every 120 minutes.
8. Special Powers: Were granted to Local Authorities, the RDC, DHS and other agencies who were given arbitrary powers to interfere with, stop and otherwise prevent the free conduct of normal life, now granted to Local Authorities, RDC, DHS and other agencies who retain arbitrary powers to interfere with, stop and otherwise prevent the free conduct of "life as we used to know it".
9. Press Conferences, Public Briefings and Slogan Launches: Were daily at 6pm, now once every 24 hours at 18.00 hours.
Whilst these clear differences should enable people properly to embrace the "new normal" and to go about their lives safely - as they are historically accustomed to doing ["History" for this purpose began in March 2020 [Ed]] - we should be aware that any rule is necessarily subject to change [as well as interpretation by the powers that be]. Whilst the public is assured that there will be "no going back", the authorities have not ruled out "going forward" in a manner best described as "quod fuit ante" [as it was before] or "pre-a-posteriori normalem" [as it was after it was before it was normal] - as and when the medical evidence suggests it would be in the political interest - or just plain fun - to do so.
Here to help.